pennylane: the eternal optimist

Monday, May 30, 2005

haunted

i had a dream about him last night...not the guy i've been dating but the last one who broke my heart. the feeling was uncanny, i never realized he still has that effect on me. i'm not mad at him, i'm actually angry at myself...not for loving him because that was by choice but for forcing myself to believe it could still work when it was already over long before it ended. it's mystical, come to think of it...you love someone, it doesn't work out...and no matter how much you hurt, you still survive.

i guess that's the complexity of the whole situation...you move on but you don't really forget.

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